Saint Carlo Acutis and the Art of Persuasive Storytelling

Taking applications for a fresh-faced someone to save the world

When we were in Italy this summer, we were inundated with images of Carlo Acutis, the “gaming saint.” His adorable, teenage mug was screen-printed onto T-shirts, mouse pads, and shot glasses everywhere from Rome to Assisi, heralding a new, younger age of religious enlightenment.

You could say he is kinda a big deal.

Before Carlo died of Leukemia in 2006, he used his love of Christ and web-based computer technology to spread the news of miracles the world over. Plus, word has it that he was a stand-up kid and kicked ass at Super Mario. Forever 15, he will be the first millennial to be canonized by the Catholic Church—in fact, this coming Sunday.

Post-death by the cruelest cancer, Pope Francis declared him a person of virtue, and his holy presence went on to heal two people. All it took was two allotted miracles, and he was sealed for sainthood. It probably helps a bit that he was attractive, and with his backpack-wearing aesthetic, he certainly casts a wide net of appeal over the 9- to 14-year-old set.

A fisher of men indeed.

Back here in Texas, for a world lit class, I was tasked with rereading parts of the book Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari, and one of the quotes the professor pulled out stuck with me.

“There are no gods in the universe, no nations, no money, no human rights, no laws, and no justice outside the common imagination of human beings.”

Whether meaning to or not, the book really makes the case for an education in English, communications, and the humanities, citing that the existence of everything beyond the natural world is based on man’s ability to tell a persuasive story. This is how religions, communities, corporations, countries, and other entities are formed. Compelling storytelling is what enables hundreds/thousands/millions of strangers to cooperate and work towards common goals.

So, look, social truth (not to be confused with Truth Social) is only valid because a group of people collectively decides that something is true. As a society, we all have general ideas of what the people around us have collectively deemed right and wrong over the course of decades and lifetimes. This is what makes AI and the internet so frightening to some people, because it actually has the ability to help alter reality and shift truth quickly and efficiently. And I know many of us are watching in awe as unbelievable changes occur that do not benefit the everyday American in the least. Alternatively, maybe some of us are watching with joy and reassurance, but that all depends on which side of these new “truths” you fall on. To each his own.

It made me think that if we are horrified by the new realities that are being created for us by one persuasive soul (backed by legions of fundamentalists and racists), then wouldn’t it be possible to develop another alternate reality, or at least a return to the old one? I know this is nothing new, but it reinforces the fact that we need a new voice.

Someone with vision and persuasive storytelling skills.

To reach a broad audience, one must speak at no higher than an eighth-grade level. Places of higher journalism (NY Times/Wall Street Journal) usually write at an 11th-grade level or above. Recent linguistic analysis shows that a certain orange-faced individual speaks at a fourth-grade level, thus enhancing his general appeal.

I guess what I’m saying…. Is there not a fourth grader among us with a strong moral character, progressive views on social justice, solid math skills, empathy for humanity, and a persuasive way with words who can step in and save us from this madness?

If the soon-to-be sainted Acuti can get his likeness on cases of triptychs, heal the sick from the afterlife, and go on to be canonized in the Catholic Church—no doubt converting legions of pre-teen girls and boys in the process—why can’t the liberals find a fresh-faced someone to save the world? Granted, Carlos’s mom is probably one hell of a publicist, but still… There has to be an American Malala or Greta who is ready to stand up and tell our story in a way that will resonate with the masses and force the winds of change.

Accepting applications now.